Wallow

I was wondering, What are journals really for? From a psychology standpoint they're supposed to keep you happy, clear-headed, focused and all that noise, but I was thinking that's only if you do them a certain way. I don't want to wallow in things that are happening to me that I think suck, and just re-live them over and over again in my head. Does this not reinforce negative thinking? I could try to write about positive things, but then I wouldn't be learning or overcoming bad experiences, and I thought that was the point.

So I got some bad experiences. Some of which I already posted out on Facebook. Not in detail though, as for one thing I don't want to wine, and for another thing, there is a specific person that my post sort of is about, (that I don't want this person to see). That's not all of it though.

I'm starting to think that porn is bad. I have a bit more freedom to talk about it here, since no one I know reads these things. I feel ashamed after looking at porn, and it takes a toll mentally. If I have a generally high sex drive, how do I stop "looking"? I can live in my head, which I've tried, but it only makes the urges stronger. So, here's what I'm going to do: I'm going to record it. I think that is the proper way to journal anyway. Record my progress, and how it makes me feel. So like for today, I was checking out Cam4, and found this gorgeous french girl. Didn't feel to bad about that, but it makes me shameful about porn from yesterday. I think there is some reinforcement going on. I don't want to stop masturbating all together, so I'm just going to journal how this whole thing makes me feel. This will be in addition to attempts to clear my mind of course. Now I'm off to exercise!